Fresh Bride

The High Art of Inspiration.

Fresh Bride's high art of the wedding ceremony will relaunch in 2006.  Meanwhile, be inspired:

Dress by Michae Kaye Couture.

Party Favors & The Ceremony.

Here's an example of how to tie in your party favors with your ceremony to create continuity in the day --  meaning each aspect of the wedding day is connected to the others, not "separate from."  The ceremony can offer meaning and excitement about the forthcoming wedding favors.  For example...

There's a company called Evergreen Memories, www.evergreenmemories.ca, through which you can give your guests a gift of nature  -- a seedling tree beautifully boxed for your wedding (photo below).  If you were to give these as favors, you could talk about them in your wedding ceremony so that the guests know why you chose them, which creates added meaning to the gift you are giving.  How?  Have one of your friends read an explanation that goes like this:

"As you know, Rick and Sara love the outdoors.  They spend a lot of time camping and hiking and river rafting and have great regard for the state of the environment.  So, before you leave today, you will each receive the gift of a seedling tree to plant.  Rick and Sara request that you plant this tree with careful attention, that you care for it with love in honor of their wedding, and that you make a dedication when you plant it -- 'for the betterment of the environment.'  Today in this ceremony, we take a moment to do just that -- to plant Rick and Sara's seedling tree in this specially chosen pot, which is a gift from their wedding party; to honor their love; and to honor their love for the environment.  We invite Rick's friend Lars, who is here from Belgium, and Sara's friend Cherise, a master gardener, to come forward and do the honors."

Note:  you can place a little water dipping bowl and a pretty towel on the ceremony table where this ritual is conducted so that the planters can freely touch the dirt and then delicately clean their hands  before returning to their seats.

Engage Your Guests!

I became a ceremony writer and officiant, in part, after sitting at one too many weddings observing people looking at their watches and wondering when dinner would be served. The problem is that guests are frequently invited to be passive witnesses at a ceremony that has nothing to do with them personally.  The remedy is to engage your guests in your ceremony by involving them in it.  Give them something to do.  Let them know their presence matters.  Here's one way:

Just before you say your vows, have your bridesmaids carry baskets of flower petals to the guests, asking each guest to take a handful. The officiant then guides your guests through holding their petals next to their heart while making a silent wish for the bride and groom.  After a pause of silence for wish making, the officiant instructs the guests to come sprinkle the flower petals in a circle around the feet of the marrying couple.  The guests then return to their seats. And you are swimming in the good wishes of all your guests just as you approach the most important part of your ceremony:  your vows and ring exchange.  This is a beautiful and incredibly moving ritual for everyone present. It's also great for photos.  I know.  I've been there many times.

Enjoy!

The Art of the Marriage Contract.

A Ketubah is a decorative Jewish marriage certificate that contains an elaborately artistic design combined with words that, traditionally, specified the legal obligations of a groom to his bride.  Today, however, the concept of the Ketubah is frequently updated and borrowed by couples of from non-Jewish and non-religious backgrounds.  It's being adapted as a personalized marriage or committment ceremony contract.  And it's so popular because this particular contract is designed as a work of art! The signing of this ritual object can be an action element of the wedding ceremony, shared by bride, groom,officiant, and guests.

Ketubah Considerations:

1.  The content of the Ketubah, or marriage contract, can be the vows you each recite during your ceremony. 

2.  Alternatively, the content can be another set of words that speak to your mutual values around the idea of commitment.  Sometimes a poem, a koan, or piece of literature does the job. 

3.  There are lots of websites that will create the ketubah artwork for you, along with wording to choose from. Here's a reputable site that can provide both the inspiration and the product: www.ketubahtree.com

Sweet Charity.

In order to know "delight," we must also, unfortunately, know "suffering." One does not exist without the other. So, make something sweet and meaningful out of the delight of your wedding day by dedicating the merit of your love to world peace. Ex: As the very first ceremonial action (after your walk down the aisle), invite your maid of honor to light a candle and say something like this: "Today, may the merit of Tom and Natalie's love serve to enhance world peace."

This simple expression of generosity costs nothing, yet it opens the hearts of everyone present and adds to the glow of your wedding day.