Uniquely Creative Doesn't Mean Creating a Spectacle.

I got a call from a bride the other day who liked what she read on my website www.ceremonies.info   She and her fiance are not religious and want help in creating a ceremony that is serious but different and personalized.  She said she's really open to doing something unqiuely creative, but that her fiance is a little nervous that he might be asked to stand up in front of 100+ people and make a spectacle of himself.  I hear this a lot from guys and the reason is clear:  He simply doesn't know what "uniqely creative" means. The solution is to demystify it for him -- as soon as possible! 

Here's one way to explain it...

Religious traditions prescribe a "form" for ceremony, so generally people know what to expect when they are going to a synagogue, church or mosque.  Non-religious ceremonies are open to playing with the form, but should not be so far out of box that the ceremony lacks dignity and respect. Tell your fiance that the ceremony will absolutely look and feel like a wedding.  The "unique" part will come from making it uniquely yours --  by using words and actions that truely reflect your values, your needs, and your interests as individuals and as a married couple -- as opposed to the prescribed values and needs of a particular religious tradition.

The "creative" part comes through matching the ceremony words and actions to your values and your particular personalities. When it's done really well, the officiant weaves all of this together with language that sounds just like YOU -- adding a little extra polish and poetic flow for the special day.  So, nothing to fear; no spectacle needed in being "uniquely creative," but rather, an opportunity to have the ceremony done totally your way.